The Never Ending War: Football vs Women ~ @haywenzo

Variety of thrilling sports and football ranks as the best among these endless sports (NB: Not American football). 

I wonder why it gets so much attention; probably because we men like to chase after things. I mean, men chase after women, we chase after success, chase after those young robust girls with tiny legs as our wives would say (I, for one, am an exception, I don’t indulge in such) and as stated, leather balls or watch people chase after leather balls. 

Football is a rather elating sport and sitting to watch alone brings a man unequalled joy. When engrossed in an ongoing football match, there seems to be some obstacles along the line on this expedition(watching 90 mins), that is a thriller and these obstacles are chiefly dominated by women (more or less I’m saying obstacles=women in this context, so whenever you see women kindly interchange with the right word as appropriate). 
You’re watching a match that has your undivided attention and your woman (call her obstacle or whatever, my hands are clean now) begins to nag, that is when your woman requires you to come lie in bed or help her trim her toe nails that are already well trimmed; or probably help her help your son with his already completed homework or maybe help her check the neighbour’s dog’s lover’s cousin that got hit by a moving vehicle (I’m certain we all know how frivolous all these things are when football is being considered). 
So many men have been accused of cheating simply because they wouldn’t abandon a football match for their women (I can live with that, I mean, football is bae, it should be the one complaining instead and no no I’m not taking sides), this is one of the toughest decision for a man. 
It is absolutely not viable for someone like me to neglect my woman and rather infeasible to not give all my attention to an ongoing football match, so you see how nature is toying with my emotions and causing a rift? 
Women are adorable and men can’t do without them except you’re the type that sees nothing bad in wearing diapers. But one thing men can’t do without also is football, nothing to kick and to watch as well? That would be utterly unfair if you ask me. 
I wonder profoundly which is more important, you’ll only be winning if your woman is a football fanatic as well as you are or if your woman is your football (the kicking and other aspects have to be nullified though, heading should be the only activity, that is if you get what I mean). I look forward to a world where Football and women sit to reach an agreement and they do not in anyway interfere with each other’s businesses to avoid world war 3. 
Just as I low-key look forward to a Nigeria with constant light and educated danfo drivers, oh and also In-corrupt politicians and OBJ’s deat….Have a good day or night.

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